Monday, April 4, 2011

Chasing the dream - 2 weeks till Boston - "Never give up"

Today marks two important events in my Boston Marathon journey:

1. I received my Boston Marathon welcome kit in the mail - very exciting.
2. I've finally made it to the taper - even more exciting.

 It's been a hard fought three months of training. I've battled through ITBS (Illiotibial Band Syndrome), I've battled through "the plods" (the heavy legs that one gets as a result of over-training), and now I'm in the midst of the biggest battle yet in my Boston journey: a mysterious groin injury.
Yes, the groin pain is STILL a mystery.  I went to see my physiotherapist last Monday, and she put me through another round of stress tests to see if my pelvis was the root of the problem.  I passed all of the stress tests once again, indicating that I don't have a fracture....yet.  It's also highly likely that it's not a tendon issue either.  With the mystery still in tact, the recommendation to cease running is also...still in tact. 

It's been another long week of cross training on bikes and elliptical trainers.  I have never looked forward to anything less than my elliptical workouts.  I've never been a fan of the treadmill, and I only run on the treadmill when an injury is preventing me from running outdoors; but now I look longingly at the treadmill from my unhappy roost on the elliptical.  I'd give anything to be able to run on that treadmill now.

Married to the Marathon

This recent bout of injury has been a bitter pill to swallow.  I'm haunted by an angry feeling that follows me around like a little raincloud, and sometimes the discontent overtakes me in fits of tears.  I'm torn between happiness that the dream is still alive, and my frustration to have this one, important dream hijacked by an injury. 

I've dreamed about Boston the way many women dream about their wedding day: I wanted it to be perfect.  Just like a bride, I dreamed that April 18th would be "my day"; only instead of dancing in a white dress I would be running in a pair of Mizunos.  And instead of walking down an aisle, I would be following in the footsteps of the greatest runners in the world along one of the most infamous marathon courses in the history of running.  But now I'm full of worry that I'll never make it to the "alter", and that the months of planning for the big day will culminate in a tragic end.

My physiotherapist, being stumped by my groin pain, recommended I seek a bone scan to understand if the source of the pain is stress to my pelvic bone.  I managed to get a bone scan booked for tomorrow.  The results often take a week to come back, which means I won't have the results of the bone scan until a day or two before leaving for Boston.  It's too late to alter the course of my final weeks of training, but will hopefully the bone scan will give me some insight into the nature of my injury so that I can run Boston accordingly.  If it truly is a weakness in my bone, I will be running Boston very carefully. 

Not exactly what I had in mind; but then, how often do dreams turn out exactly the way you imagined?  At this point, I don't care about the white dress.  All I want is to actually make it to the alter and enjoy the ceremony - preferably without pain or injury. That would be enough.  That would still be a dream come true. 

I'm not giving up.

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